I often find myself thinking back to past moments. And each time, the same thought comes into my head, I can't believe how fast the time has gone. I can't I believe I was there, living in the moment. When I think back to old memories, it feels surreal. I feel like I was watching a movie. As I let myself go deeper into the memory, I want to re-live it again. I want to be there again, just for a moment.
Don't take me wrong, it's not that I want to go back to the past because I don't like my life at the present. I'm very much grateful with my life at the present. So why then, do I want to re-live past moments?
Maybe it's because the future is uncertain. Maybe because no matter how hard I try to make out what the future will be, no matter how hard I shape what my future will be, deep down I know that I am clueless of what the future will be like. I don't know what tomorrow will bring me. I have no idea what will happen next week, month, year. And sometimes that makes me feel uneasy. Sometimes I just want to close my eyes and let myself drown in memories, because I know what will happen next.
But at some other times, even though I know the slim chances of it happening, I close my eyes and let my mind crafts a chain of future stories. Sometimes, the future excites me.
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